A year of change

It's hard to believe that a year has passed since the foundations of my life as I knew it would be shaken to the core.

I had a great experience for a week in Tennessee in early July of 2015 and it shook me in ways I had not anticipated. The first night there I cried myself to sleep, for many years I had been unable to cry.
There were ups and downs, moments of deep reflection, and a sense within my spirit that great change was coming into my life.

About a week after that I went on a camping trip and nearly drowned at the first place we went hiking and swimming. It was pretty rough and a miracle that I was able to get to a rock. I had been stuck in a current in very deep water near a waterfall with an extreme charlie horse in my right leg. It was so bad I couldn't even roll over to my back and I had already gone under the water three times. I struggled the third time with whether or not to call for help or retain the last of my energy to make it to something to grab on to.

For some reason I was completely emotionally wrecked after that experience, especially sinces two of my kids were on the trip. I sat alone often afterward on our trip by the shores of Lake Superior wondering what all these emotional experiences meant at this time in my life.

I attended an annual conference in leadership about a week or two following that trip during the first week of August. On the first day someone suggested that 10% of the people in attendance were on the edge of quitting their job. I had mentioned to one of my coworkers that I was in the 10%. That I felt a strong pull in my heart that my time there was complete and that I was facing a new road in life...but I could not see what it was or what would happen, just that big change was on the way and I would know by December for sure. I couldn't say why I knew that, I just knew. I told him that I would probably stay through November for sure as there was a mission trip planned at that time for Nicaragua.

During that time there was a great amount of turmoil at home and a distinct rift was gaining depth between me and my spouse that had been slowly growing over many years, but at this point was so far....it was irretrevable. A deep lack of connection and many other factors left me realizing that we couldn't just fake it for the kids anymore.

Steps were being put in motion to mutually conclude that it was over and time to move on and focus on healing and finding our best selves as it wasn't working out to be our best self together.
By September papers were filed.
I left my job in mid October.
November was rough looking for a new job in a new town, but then I decided to stay and took a job here locally.

December I moved into my own apartment, alone. I felt it was best for the kids to have the least amount of change and even though it was suggested I stayed with the kids, the current living situation with a family member made that difficult to find a workable solution and my work schedule would make it hard to be there for the kids before school. This way, they didn't have to change where they lived, went to school, or the bus route they were on.

January was the start of a new year. February our Divorce was finalized.

After working for the temp agency for 9 months I was hired full time by the company in July.
Still in process, still in change, still in transitions.

It's amazing how some of the things that happened last summer prepared me for the next season and phase of my life.

I am looking forward to a new beginning, to new opportunities, and to new adventures.

I also started longboarding this year and I am hoping to have many more new experiencs.

I will be attending the Leadership Conference again in just two weeks so I am excited about that. :)